I Am Fed Up And Don’t Know What To Do With My 10 Year Old?
He is in 4th grade now and I have been going through the same thing every year (ever since kindergarten). Every teacher has told me he is very bright but he doesn’t apply himself. He is reading at a 7th grade reading level and is in G.A.T.E. classes 2 days a week (gifted and talented education). My problem is that he wants to be the class clown and doesn’t do his class work or homework ( I check his homework every night but he only does half of it and says he is done I am just finding out from his teacher, I thought that what he had done was all he had to do ). He has gotten 2 demerits this week from not doing homework and school work and if he gets one more he is suspended. We have tried everything, we have grounded him from friends, video games, tv, toys and even gutted out his room. Spanking has not worked either. Any suggestions? He is too smart to be doing this stuff and I don’t know what to do for him anymore.
Sounds to me like your son is bored in class. He is obviously way ahead of the curve, and it all just seems pretty redundant to him. Maybe if he was challenged more, he would feel the need to put forth effort. My daughter is 11, 6th grade and in GATE. She always does her homework, but never feels the need to take the extra step, give more information, etc. There could possibly be a bit of ADD or ADHD involved there as well. Its so hard at this age, we are trying to figure out what makes them tick, and they aren’t even sure of that themselves. Talk to your doctor, teacher/counselors, and GATE staff. See what their ideas are. But, he definitely sounds bored to me.
Also, regarding the homework – you should check into getting the daily assignments emailed to you so that you already know what he should be working on at home. Don’t take his word for it that it is completed, make him show you. If he doesn’t, send him to bed.
Sometimes when kids are very smart and ahead of the other kids in their grade they just need more or else they get bored. My friends son is the same way and they are considering to have him skip a grade. He is probably just so incredibly bored and acts out because of it. The school needs to do more for him then just give him demerits, there is only so much you can do at home to keep his behavior in check! Good Luck!
He’s bored out his mind doing kiddy work. I remember the feeling. I think you should talk to his teacher about letting him read a book or complete homework in class when he’s waiting for others to finish so that he doesn’t become disruptive. Now that you know about the homework situation- read his homework list every night and doublecheck it.
its a long process but will prove useful.You need to gear yourselves for taking the approach of making sure you praise the work that has been done rather than scorn because it has not been completed.Remember five praises to each criticism. Try this for two weeks. Good luck and thankfully you don’t have a spiteful child just a naughty one.
maybe you could enroll him in a learning center like sylvan. that way, he will be forced to do his work and care about school.
does he do a sport? sports can promote values like teamwork. if he sees the value of doing a sport or being on a team it might encourage him to focus on school more.
Meet with your childs teacher, principal and G.A.T.E advisors and work out an action plan. Your son needs help, he is not trying to be naughty, he’s just bored. I know you probably know that already but you need to make sure all of your sons other mentors know that too.
Good luck!
you shouldnt be sending to school they will ruin his life and he will hate you try home schooling him then at least you can take the credit for your fu*ked up son.
talk to the school, people who are gifted and find work too easy tend to be the class clown because they are not challenged with the given work
I am 10 there is a boy like that in my class but I’m smarter than him LOL
The main thing is: he thinks that being technically “smart” is the best and only way to succeed in school. However, it is not. Is he aware of the big deal about college applications? I think that you need to sit him down and tell him that he will never be smart if he keeps slacking off. It might seem a little harsh, so ease the blow by telling him that you will help him. I would not suggest spanking him any more, just tell him to go in his to do his homework and don’t let him out. Make him show you his work. If this does not work, ground him from everythingat once. The top priority for him should be his homework. Hope this helps! And good luck! Please e-mail me with results.
Maybe he should be pushed up a grade because it is to easy for him, or he’s just getting at that age where he thinks ”Cool kids don’t do homework” and he does half of it and tells you he completed it all. I’d go to his teacher and principal and have him get an Agenda book and the teacher writes all of the homework/assignments scheduled for that night. I guess he’s just bored..and needs challenging work.
Same problem here, I also have a 4th grader who is smart and doesn’t”t apply himself either. Well after christmas break and he still didn’t have a cellphone he asked what he have to do to get one for the summer. I told him he would have to apply him self more at school. Finish class work no grade lower than a B- and come home every day and finish his homework with out being asked, and so far so good. All his friends have cellphone so now he is working hard to get one for the summer.
Maybe he needs more of a challenge. I know I found school work very easy and because of always being able to get top marks without trying I have a lot of motivational problems now, and often didn’t bother with assignments till the last minute. You could talk to his teachers about putting him up another level perhaps.
Also have you tried getting him thinking about what he wants to do when he’s older, so he feels like he’s working towards a goal. Maybe taking him to places he might find interesting like the planetarium or zoo and then talking about what jobs he could do with those interests.
Maybe instead of taking things away you could reward him with a month of perfect homework completion he can start taking classes in something he’s interested in, or get him something he really wants, so that he’s actually working towards something. If he’s not actually learning anything when he’s doing his homework it must seem really boring and pointless to him.
My guess is that if he really is smart then he recognises that he is in some way different to his friends.
I assume he spends most of his time with average children.
Being different is one thing most kids don’t want to be.
So it seems to me that the answer is to get him to spend more time with kids where some may be even smarter than he is.
Making his life miserable over this problem wont help much and may well make him more resentful.
By the way as a family do you have books available and items that will make him realise that serious things can be interesting.
Most kids don’t want to hear that I know so You have to do it in a cunning manner.
Get him to find out about things that interest him.
Expecting him to concentrate on his home work while you relax and enjoy yourself or even nag him isn’t going to help.
If he only likes pop music/sport and friends then you have a problem lol.
Academic success isnt everything.
One other possibility is that he is not as smart as he has been assessed as being, he cant keep up so he clowns about as a cover.